The Soup's Joel McHale

Welcome to Young Hollywood. Okay, so what is it with you and Ryan Seacrest?

Ryan Seacrest? Are you guys He's my lord. Uh Ryan is my lord and savior. Uh he he's omnipotent. He knows where I am at all times. It was the E network and now it's just Ryan. He is what I strive to be. I'm like a level four metro sexual. He's definitely like a level 19 at this point. He's so dang petite. It's just yeah.

He's more petite than you. What I don't like about Ryan is that he does not allow me to have eye contact with him. When I was an intern at E. There really was in the memo that you could not make eye contact with the talent.

Cuz I've seen some of those memos and I test the interns out every day cuz I'll be like, "How's it going?" You're out of here. And I'll be like, "Head bow your head." And then I'll go like, "How's it going?" And then and then if they speak, then I will say, "You're you're fired." I say and you have to say, "Permission to speak." And then I say, "Permission granted." And then they say fine.

We're going to go back a little a little ways. Tell us about getting to first base.

Getting to first base. Um I'm going to say Tori Bo's seventh grade. Oh, the atmosphere was uh it was a playground at the Catholic School, St Monica's in Mercer Island, Washington. Uh well no, I think that was Maria.

Oh, you better get this straight.

Yeah, boy, are they going to be upset?

Were they like the the popular hot chicks in school?

No, they were from the leper colony next to the No, she still managed to head butter a couple times.

What ever happened to either or first kiss? You know? What ever happened?

Well, she died of lip herpes. It's not just about age. It's about attitude.