2 Simple Rules For Overcoming Anxiety About Networking In Hollywood!

Networking. I don’t know about you, but personally, every time I hear that word, I have to stop myself from cringing too hard. Or from overthinking every single social interaction I’ve ever had in a remotely professional context. Does anyone actually enjoy networking? It’s like the spinach of career advice – good for you, but not exactly fun. The truth is, though, Hollywood is all about who you know and who knows you. So, as someone who grew up with acute social anxiety, this was a tough hurdle to overcome if I truly wanted to make a name for myself in this world. Here are two of the strategies I’ve used to counter my overthinking!

1. Be Unapologetic

My dad once told me a story about my grandfather and how he went from nothing to building a successful company all on his own. There was one quote about him that has stuck with me throughout the early stages of my professional development: he wasn’t afraid to “kick down doors.” That simple sequence of words has been in the back of my mind every time I’ve worked to put myself out there with someone. It’s a very true necessity: if you want something, you can’t be afraid to go get it. You just have to do it. At the stage I’m at in my career, this means talking to as many people in the industry as I can in order to learn about potential paths I can take once I graduate. As someone with no familial connections, this means that my only built-in network is through the alumni from my college. This can only get one so far before they’ve exhausted all possible connections. As such, I often have to ask alumni if they can connect me with someone else, or sometimes just straight-up cold email people I don’t know. This sounds terrifying, and it is. But what’s the worst that can happen? Either a no (which is rare), a yes (which is great!), or no response (and let’s be honest, is this really that big a deal?). When you think of it this way, there’s really no reason to be afraid. And how can you be? Truth is, you can’t, at least if you want success. So just do it. Kick down doors.

2. See The Good In Others, and The Good In Yourself

Initiating a conversation is one thing. But what about when you’re actually in it? It can be hard to talk to someone if you’re socially anxious, and it’s even harder when the nature of that interaction can be somewhat transactional. The way I’ve been able to mitigate this is by remembering that most people are trying to do good by this world. In the spot I’m at especially, people just want to help me, because they know how hard it was when they themselves were in my position. When looking at a conversation this way, I’ve found it immensely easier to relax, because I don’t feel as though I’m a nuisance or wasting someone’s time. In this vein, it’s also crucial to see yourself as someone good and worth talking to. Just because you’re technically “using” someone for your self-benefit doesn't mean that you’re a bad person, especially because, as someone with their own interesting story, you also have a lot to offer to the other party. When you think like this, you stop getting bogged down by the superficiality of how the conversation was initiated and start realizing that the “transactionality” is a minor part of its much larger, more important, and truer nature: a creation of a meaningful connection.

Good luck out there!